Ted Hullinger

Ted Hullinger was a man of many fine attributes, talents and interests. His life cannot be described by words or lists, but a few themes stand out.

Ted was, above all else, a friend to all. His friends are at once his legacy and defining feature. To know Ted was to love him and to love to be around him. Once you were Ted’s friend, and that wasn’t difficult, you were in! A huge grin and a bear hug sealed the deal, and you had a friend for life.

Ted had a wide circle of friends and family in the Napa Valley, and as an avid world explorer, his adventures yielded friends across the county and the world. But despite the large friend network Ted had, these were not superficial relationships—Ted nurtured his friendships. Ted loved to “check in,” via text, email, or phone. He wanted to make sure that “all is well, what’s up, hope to see you soon.” Ted was happy, and indeed eager to aid his friends and family in need. There was no refrigerator too heavy, no drive too long, no anxiety too severe—Ted would be right there, helping his friend with the crisis du jour. Ted was a man you could always count on, and we all did. But best of all, Ted would just drop by— bring something handcrafted, caught, or foraged, and then chat for a while. He always left you feeling better than you did before he came. He was comfortable to be around, and comfortable with himself.

Ted’s generosity and kindness were both well-known and secret. There is the time Ted, driving, spotted a stranger on the side of the road, dejected and forlorn. Ted pulled over, inquired into the cause of the obvious dejection, discovered a man abandoned by his friends. This man was taken in, fed by Ted the chef, housed in Ted’s home, and introduced to the attractions of our beautiful valley. The man, inspired by the buoyant spirit of this joyful giant, is now a famous chef in Europe, a life change he credits entirely to Ted. While this story is known, because the beneficiary wanted it so, there are many instances of generosity and charity which are known only to Ted and the people he helped.

Ted had an adventurous spirit and an immense love of the outdoors. At various times in his life he could be found mountain biking, hiking, backpacking, fly fishing, mountain climbing, scuba diving, free diving for abalone, spearfishing, wakeboarding, snowboarding, skiing, and hunting. It is difficult to say which of his activities were his favorites, but some stand out.

Burning Man was a special event for Ted, and for nearly two decades he journeyed to Black Rock City in the Nevada desert to participate. Burning Man’s core principles of community, gifting, self-expression, voluntarism, and radical inclusion closely aligned with Ted’s beliefs and epitomized his activities on the playa and in how he lived his life. Every year he volunteered to be one of the lead chefs preparing meals for the team of people responsible for organizing, implementing, and managing the event. Ted was famous for the dozens of beautiful handmade tie-dye shirts he made and gave out each year. Perhaps most importantly, Ted found solace in the desert; it was a spiritual place and time for him. Backpacking was another love. Summer found him on vigorous multi-day trips in some of the most challenging and remote wilderness areas in the western United States. His back-country knowledge and patient teaching skills inspired and touched many St. Helena Troop 1 Boy Scouts on their annual 50 mile trips. His immense strength and generous spirit ensured that he was always the one who helped most, and came away with new friends for life.

Though he loved the desert and mountains, the sea was even more special to Ted. He learned to love the sea from his father, and oceanic adventures were a Hullinger family staple. A powerful swimmer, Ted would brave the chill and swell of the Northern California ocean in all seasons. His diving prowess was legendary. His huge lung capacity allowed him to stay submerged longer than seemed possible, enabling him to gather the largest and most beautiful abalone. While his appearance suggested that his spirit animal was a bear, his adaptation to the sea indicates a sea lion as a close relative. We all can remember Ted showing up at our homes, happy, smiling proudly, sharing his beautiful, delectable catch of the day.

Ted was multi-talented, having had a career in finance as a young man, but ultimately finding his passion in the kitchen. Whether he was cooking a feast for friends and family, or working in a professional kitchen, Ted gave his all, and loved every minute of the process, the people, and the food. He became an accomplished chef, and was proud of the skills he acquired and the joy he brought to others through food. He was famously indefatigable, even in a profession requiring endurance, and it was often his strength and will that made a success out of culinary events large and small. Ted loved nothing more than cooking over a wood fire grill whether it be the perfect ribeye, a whole branzino, or paella for fifty.

Twenty years ago, Ted met Brenda Bosetti, the love of his life. Brenda and Ted were passionate about each other and life, and together they made a home that became the most important place in the world for both of them. They were inseparable, and they became a St. Helena institution. Their shared life included a love of gardening, travel, their spoiled pets, and their professional lives as chefs. Ted and Brenda were instantly recognizable in the company of their big, beautiful Bernese Mountain Dogs, and later their Miniature Schnauzers. Days off found them on trips to the coast, often at Bodega and other north coast coves and beaches. Ted was submerged, bagging abalone or spear fishing, Brenda dry and warm by the beach fire. But Ted and Brenda‘s true center was their home in Rutherford, with their close friends and family nearby and their work together in St. Helena. Ted found peace and purpose, and felt happy with who he was and what he gave to the world. Ted still loved to travel, but in the end, he had found his paradise, with his beloved, and there was no place he would rather be. He was content.

In recent years, Ted was overjoyed that he and Brenda were able to see Ted’s family on trips to Park city. Playing cards with his mother on these trips was one of Ted’s most cherished activities.

Ted was predeceased by his father, Arvin Hullinger, his grandparents Martel and Maurine Cooper, James and Lora Hullinger, and his cousins, Katie Cooper and Doug Cooper. He is survived by Brenda Bosetti, his mother, Annette Cooper Hullinger, and siblings Mark (Charlene), Dan (Ellen), Kari Ambrose (Tim), Suzanne Ely, Jane Johnson (Durk), Mindi Call (Mike), Julie Duffin (Rob), and John (Kristen) and numerous aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces and nephews.

Close to Ted’s heart, he is also survived by his extended family of the Bosetti, Davies, Navone, and Ghiringhelli families, along with many friends that shared love and way too much food at Sunday night dinners and holidays.

We will remember Ted as remarkable for his generosity, kindness, unshakable optimism, and good humor. He was a man equally adept at helping out in times of trouble and celebrating in times of triumph. The world was a brighter, friendlier, more joyous place with Ted Hullinger in it. He lives on in the hearts and minds of his friends and family, the warmth of his embrace and smile will linger all the days of our lives.

Visitation will be held on Saturday, November 14, from 10 am to 12 noon at the St.Helena Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. There will be no memorial service at this time due to Covid-19.